Camera Crew Tuesday: Only Time

Dear Chloe,

It's been a long couple of days, as we've all been sick with a bad cold. Six days later, we're all finally feeling more like ourselves and ready to bust down the doors of this house. We've been cooped up!

It's so rare for us to get sick {yes, we're those people} but when we do -- we are down for the count and just plain miserable. We tried to get out and enjoy the nice 80 degree weather that March brought us over the weekend, we even took our usual trips to the park, but our colds always won and our outings never lasted too long.

We just felt...sick.

These are the kinds of days one would prefer that NO Camera Crew be present. You don't look your best, you don't feel your best, and most days you just lay around in your pj's with messy hair. This is the exact reason you won't be seeing any pictures of Daddy and I in this post. ;)

I did manage, however, to snap a few cute ones of you on some of our short outings for coffee and juice. Thank the Lord for drive-thru Starbucks!

It was nice to see you smiling, even when you didn't feel so great, and the outings provided the break from the house we all so desperately needed.

As for me, I've been feeling better too, but I can't say the same for Daddy. He was the last to get the cold and last night he had a slight fever. As soon as I saw "99.9" register on the thermometer -- I ordered him straight to bed with cold medicine and advil.

Not before fulfilling his dinner request though, of course. ;) It's one of your favorites too.

Spaghetti a la bolognese with homemade gluten free garlic bread -- steam included ;)

We love comfort food. Actually, being the "foodies" we are, we just LOVE food in general. So even though we felt under the weather, cooking in this house never ceased.

Surprisingly, I still felt like cooking -- a first in all the times I've been sick.

Our menu also included Gluten Free Grilled Cheese Sandwiches and Minestrone Soup. And always, despite our not liking the taste, we drank lots of "Emergen-C" drinks. One of the many things I whipped up during our weekend in.

Luckily, Daddy woke up feeling refreshed, fever free, and with more energy this morning. I guess that "Emergen-C" stuff really works. :)

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Onto this week's inspiration --

Today's letter to you was inspired by the song "Only Time" by Enya. I heard it literally minutes before I started typing this, as you and I traveled back from a trip to the grocery store. It's timing seemed more than appropriate, as Time is the thing we seem to be up against and waiting on the most these days.

Waiting for it to pass, waiting for things to change, waiting for new things to surface, waiting for us to get better and healthy again.

The lyrics spoke to me.

Who can say where the road goes

Where the day flows, only Time.

I have mixed feelings though over my relationship with Time. Although it's true, like the song suggests, that only time will tell where a road will lead and how things will change and evolve -- it's also true that your feelings over Time itself can change. Some days it can feel sparse, like there is never enough of it in a single day or week.

Perfect example: Old Photos.

Like I've mentioned before, there are many days I find myself looking at old photos and thinking: Oh dear sweet Time, please - slow - down! How is it that she's gotten this big, this fast?

I like to believe I feel this way because I made my grand entrance into your life when you were five years old, but it seems true for everyone and every parent. Daddy says he feels time passing even more because he's had the full seven years with you. To him -- one day you were a baby and the next you were a big girl.

You, age 5. This was your first week on the "big girl" swings. Daddy was so very nervous and I assured him you would be okay. And of course, you were. :)

Other times or days, Time can be compared to the idea of trying to force a mule up a long, winding road up the side of a mountain -- stubborn and unbearably slow. These are the times  that "phases" can seem like an eternity, a behavioral day can feel like a week and a sick week can feel like a month.

These are the moments I wish Time would speed up and go faster; that we'd heal quicker or that an event we're looking forward to was already here.

Perfect example: Home School. I wish it were June almost every day.

I miss this:

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What I've learned most about Time, however, is how precious it is. It's so cliche and over used, but it's true. It's not until you lose someone you love, until you have a sweet little girl in front of you called your daughter, or a husband you love and adore -- that you can truly appreciate Time's presence. At least that's the case for me. Although everyone's journey to that conclusion is different.

For so long, for such a huge chunk of my life, I was wishing Time forward and envisioning myself in the future, happier. And now, here I am in the future and happier -- still playing a wrestling match with this dang gone Time. It's a bit comical, really.

But then comes into my focus, little ol' you. My daughter. The one who keeps me focused and reminds me that our Time together in this life, especially when you're this small, is so short. I'm reminded of that every day in how quickly you're growing. Today, especially, when I put on yet another pair of jeans that wouldn't fit you. You grew!

Part of me wanted to celebrate, while the other part of me felt a little sad because I know you're time as a 7 year old is drawing to a close. July is but only a blink of an eye away and before I know it, you'll turn 8.

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My conclusion? I'll never beat Time and neither will you. It will always keep moving forward whether we like it or not.

The best part though? You don't have a care in the world about it, C. And I shouldn't have a care either. So you know what? I'm taking your lead on this one.

I'm going to let you be the teacher, once again.

I'm going to ignore Time and live more in the moment. I'll worry less. I'll appreciate more each day we have together -- whether it's good or bad. And when I can't appreciate? Maybe I'll just keep moving forward like I always do, with the reassurance that the new day awaiting us has the possibility of a fresh clean slate with new, happy memories to make.

And I'll wake up with a smile on my face, like you always do, at least giving the day a chance to surprise us with something good. And yes, even days like this when we're sick. :)

Yellow mugs with subtle reminders of sunshine and summer days ahead, can help you do that. :) 

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And who am I kidding, I'm never going to lose my glass half-full perspective and my rose colored glasses anyway. These letters are proof of that. ;)

So with that in mind and with a few more days left in our week ahead -- one full of possibilities, of clean slates, new memories -- I'm going to be thankful that we once again, have 3 healthy people in this house.

After all, that in itself is something to celebrate.

We Love You, "Chlo, Chlo". Always and forever.